‘You are mine and I am yours, we will walk this path together and love each other unconditionally’ Familiar with something like this in a relationship? But then how many people in a relationship actually do what they say? How many of your boyfriends give you the same love, attention and care after two years in a relationship?
Exceptions always exist and there might be few men who would not take you for a ride and sit over your head. To have said that, leave alone men even few women take their boyfriends for granted. The point is we do not do what we actually say at the start of a relationship and it happens a lot that people take each other for granted.
This article aims at helping all you women out there who are taken for granted by your boyfriends giving you advice on tips you can follow to make your guy realize that you are not a woman to feel down in the dumps because of his strange behaviour. In other words, he better realise and works on it or its time you walk out of such a relationship. Take a look at what you can do to set right things.
Read: Signs that he is really into you
Things To Do When Your Boy Friend Takes You For Granted!
1. Get Your Facts Right Before Accusing Him
We are all imperfect and at times we tend to have unrealistic expectations and when those expectations are not fulfilled we tend to feel that we are taken for granted. Keep a check on yourself first and understand if your boyfriend is really taking you for granted or is it just your misunderstanding and high expectation? Are you being too harsh on him?
For instance, say suppose he fails to give you time or bother about you consecutively, you may feel that he is deliberately doing it. It is natural that you may feel that way, before assuming, try and find out if he is really busy. For all you know, he must be genuinely occupied. Get your facts right.
2. Be A Silent Spectator
Sometimes your heart just knows that there is something fishy, possibilities of going wrong are 100%. In this case, do not fire your boyfriend immediately. Keep your cool, think of how has he been treating you? does he pay attention to you when you have something to talk about? does he take care of you like he used to? does he consider your likes and dislikes just the way he used to earlier? does he initiate talking to you when you guys have had a fight or do you have to make an effort always?
Think about these minute things, make an observation for a while and then come to a conclusion on whether or not he is taking you for granted. Watch him and observe him without saying anything to him.
3. Express Your Concern To Him
Communication is the key to solve every problem. Provided the communication is clearly put across and at the same time understood as well. Essentially, in a relationship only when you talk about your concerns will your boyfriend know that there is something troubling you.
In case the observation you made about his behaviour proves that he is taking you for granted, then its time to talk to him about his changed behaviour. Let him know about how you feel by giving him valid examples about his changed behaviour, be as clear and transparent as you can.
When you do this, he would be aware of what you are going through and if he is keen on making you feel better he will ensure to work on himself if he understands you only then.
4. Give Him The Silent Treatment
If he has not worked on himself despite knowing it is bothering you and he is behaving indifferent, it is time you stop being answerable to him. Just stay calm and do not bother about explaining yourself another time. You have fairly done your job and its time for him to take charge of your relationship after noticing your silence.
Its rightly said, silence speaks louder than words and only if he understands that he has taken the relationship for granted he will notice your silence, understand your value and make things change.
By choosing the silent method of dealing with your problem with him you are not just making him realise his mistake but there is peace between the two of you which is any day better than fighting and saying hurtful things to each other.
5. Everyone Deserves One Chance
At times you never know but you could be the one who would unintentionally be taking your boyfriend for granted. Let’s say, if it was you who was taking him for granted, you would as well be expecting him to give you a chance right? You should do the same and not hold on to the problem.
Give him at least one chance to correct himself because it is not sensible to take hasty decisions without working on it. Just try once! There is no harm, you can surely give it a try for once.
6. Shift Your Time And Energy
As you feel miserable that he is taking you for granted, shift your focus and energy elsewhere by staying engaged with things that make you happy and you enjoy doing them. Do not overthink about what must be wrong with him that he is behaving that way with you, it is going to just damage you and your energy. You do not deserve to go through so much of a turmoil after giving into your relationship so much, isn’t it?
Thus, see to it that you start focusing on yourself by spending time with your circle of friends. It is not impossible because you can be busy with your work, spending time on your desired activities and taking care of yourself. There are chances that he might know your importance when you deprive him of the attention.
Having said, it does not mean you keep waiting to see if he is back to normal and not going to take you for granted. At any cost do not expect this. Just bear in mind that you are diverting your mind to feel better and not add to your existing disappointment.
7. Give Him A Taste Of His Own Medicine
Sometimes the only way we can make people understand is by treating them just the way they treat us, yes you may not be that kind of a person but you are left with no better option than to give it back to him just the way he makes you feel.
After being considerate and giving him a chance if he has still not learned to take you seriously, do not let him take you for granted at any cost. Stop calling him or initiating to spend time with him, ignore him and keep your distance.
Talk to him only when there is a requirement and just train your mind that you need to do this for a while and it does not mean you are being harsh with him, you are just prioritizing yourself and not letting your self-respect and feelings get hurt. As it is not fair on his end to keep taking you for granted.
8. Do Not Deprive Yourself Of Love
When you are in a relationship it is bound to happen that you tend to lose a grip about how to be happy alone. The only reason is that you are spending most of your time with your partner and you are busy creating memories.
Having said, tell yourself that life has to go on and as you have your own happiness and peace to take care of, you should pamper yourself at this moment when your boyfriend is depriving you of it. Do not feel like you are starving for love. If not anyone, you are there for your own self!
9. Wait For Him To Approach You
When your relationship is going through trials, you would have numerous thoughts hitting you at the same time. You might even feel like going back and talking to him to sort out your issues. It is good that you think beyond your ego.
However, it is not about your ego here, do not give your emotional quotient the importance, look at what is fair and unfair. It is high time that he takes a step forward and initiates to sort things out. If he does not do it now, he will never ever take you seriously and you do not want to feel hurt about it over and again, right? Which is why just let him initiate this time.
10. Make A Last-Ditch Effort For Your Relationship
You never know what are his reasons for taking you for granted. Maybe he is missing out on love from you or probably he is just testing you. That being said, just so that you do not end up regretting that you did not give your 100% to the relationship try your way of making up to make things better.
What you can do is, keep expressing your love to him emotionally and physically. Be patient with him when he needs your moral support, hug him more often, hold his hand when you are out together and make him feel you are all his. He would melt and if he truly knows your importance within no time everything will be back to normal.
If you are one of those fortunate girls to have a man who never takes you for granted then he is someone you should consider growing old with and if he turns to be someone who treats you like trash then do not stand it, re-consider if it is worth being in that relationship and at any cost do not let him continue taking your for granted.
Get this straight, you make equal efforts to work on your relationship. At the same time do not let him take advantage of the fact you are trying hard to work on the relationship. It will always work two ways, where both the parties have to reciprocate back to each other. Even if one person backs out then the relationship gets meaningless.
Do not settle for a guy who takes you for granted because you are special in your own way and no one has the right to make you feel low. If you are going through any of these problems, now you know what to do. Do not let anyone disrupt your peace of mind or let your smile fade away.
