We have all been there, a point where we are trying to reclaim our broken life. It can be pretty astounding as to how broken the human heart feel. Yes, life is tough, but no one ever sees it coming.
The need to be on top of things or being validated is what everyone shares. But to understand the power of thoughts once the circumstances are not so beneficial is also very important.
It can be anything. A relationship, your job, the monotony of things can really get to one person and make them feel like they do not have any control over their life. it is a difficult thing to t comprehend, as on the surface you might look calm and content, but the inner turmoil can only be understood by few.
Why Do We Feel Broken?
As we grow older we realize the pressure that this world can put on us. This is not the case when we are growing up as our parents or caregivers are there to shield us form the problems of this world. On becoming an adult, we are supposed to form our own defence mechanisms and own thought processes so as to decide what we want from the world.
For a person to be able to grab onto any opportunity and make the most of it, they need to be in a healthy state of mind and body so that they can see and understand the situation with a better perspective and more clarity. It is a practice that does come on right away. But the lack of such balance can affect anyone and get on the right track may seem impossible.
But it is not so difficult to just train your mind. It’s not easy but it is fairly simple. As humans, we are creatures of habit and the things we understand the bets are comfort. But for any kind of change or growth to happen. We have to go through some amount of discomfort.
Comfort is also an illusion in the sense that too much of it can make is feeling frustrated, change is the only constant and humans needs to feel validated in one form or the other. The question is, in the pursuit of self improvement just how much are humans willing to work.
Happiness and inspiration like any other reward can be found within if you look hard enough. It is not something that lies outside of you. Just as when we were children, we all have the capacity to feel immensely happy without depending on an outside stimulus, so as adults when we tend to lose our track and get too caught up in our lives, we must try to recollect the same softness and room month that we possessed as children.
But because the situation can be demanding, there certain practices or habits you must inculcate, actively to reach a point where you reclaim your power and do not feel broken.
1. Watch How You Talk to Yourself
Stop thinking that there is something wrong with you, one of the most important things that you can do for yourself is to watch the way your mental monologue work. If you are constantly putting yourself down, considering yourself “ broken” then your mind will get conditioned to think the same. There are times when you have to fake being confident, where you have to give yourself a pep talk and pick yourself up. If your thoughts alone are harmful and accusatory, it will be very difficult to get on a positive trajectory.
So be kind to yourself, be nice to yourself, be self aware and guide your own self. And do not believe every negative thought that is passing through your mind. Your anxiety is lying to you, your negativity is lying to you. Remember how loved and valuable you are and change the conversation in your head to something more uplifting. As you keep trying, it will soon become a habit, and you will be able to see the difference immediately.
The significance of this can not be emphasized enough. There is a direct co-relation between our fitness level and our temperaments. This does not mean that fit people do not get upset, it’s just that they are better equipped to deal with the stress. Of course, its all about the mental strength but the kind of perseverance that has worked for fit a body gives you is something to be admired.
When you are feeling too overwhelmed with life, there is nothing as good as a workout to uplift your mood. It is about honing and sculpting your body, you are making sure that it performs at its optimum level.
With our sedentary lifestyle, we have forgotten what it is to be completely agile and it is definitely taking a toll on our bodies. Join a gym, dance your heart out, Go for a walk, play a game of cricket, skip, jog, do whatever you have to make your body move. The release of Oxytocin will surely make you feel much better and take your mind of the sorrows of life. The clarity that you get after exercise will also help you focus better and will definitely improve your mood.
The kind of confidence, flexibility and strength that you will achieve is insurmountable and it is a definitely and sure shot way to reclaim your life and reclaim your power.
“ Not until we are lost, do we begin to understand ourselves “ – Henry David Thoreau
Travelling is one of the easiest way to make sure that you educate your heart as well as your mind. Every time you go to a new place, the kind of things you see they open up your mind a little bit more. Interacting with new people, discovering things you have never seen before, unseen views are all a way of expanding your brain and showing you what exists beyond the limits of your vision.
Solo travel is one of the best ways of getting in touch with your real self, the new found a perspective that travels rewards you with is pretty priceless. And as you venture more and more you will discover things of beauty everywhere and understand just how fascinating this world is. Traveling will not only change your world view but it will do quite quickly, a break from your usual environment will definitely make you feel much better. Start out slow, make short trips, get comfortable with the idea, rewards yourself with an experience.
4. Take Up a New Skill
Join a class, whether it is sculpting, art or dance, take up something that is a little challenging and try to come out of your head. A new skill will help you concentrate in something that’s better and more constructive, another advantage is that you will meet new people over there who will again help you change and broaden your perspectives. Understand your strengths and weaknesses outside the usual setting and discover new things about yourself.
Also, the added confidence of having learnt something new will make you feel good about yourself. Enhance your mind. Take up topics that you are interested in, give your brain an actual chance to grow- this way you will be waking up a part of your core and engaging it in something healthy.
5. Change Something About Your Appearance
Another great way to transform your outlook and reclaim your life is to do something bold, about your appearance, you could also be brave and change your hair, colour it the way you have always wanted to. This can have a very strong impact on your personality and give you the courage to do a lot of other things, this will be a confidence booster and will also help your self-image. By introducing a change in your dressing sense, or your makeup, you are acknowledging the change in your life, it is like making a resolve to be a different and better person.
6. Start Writing in a Journal
There is a certain beauty in penning down your thoughts and giving yourself a place to vent, and actually writing those words down. You will realize the power of the written, it doe not have to be heavy or beautiful writing, just honest, not only will this exercise help you form your thoughts better but it will also help you in looking at things more objectively you will understand a thing or two about self-motivation and you will learn to choose your thoughts and words more comfortably. This will help you start your day with good intention and end the day with some insight, it is truly an invaluable habit and also helps in developing gratitude.
7. Acknowledge and Encourage Gratitude
Now, this is just one of those exercises you must do every day, it is not even that hard but truly helpful. As human beings who have been this earth for some time now, we tend to forget just how good life is and how generous the universe has been. You must take time to acknowledge how grateful you are for the things that actually are going great in your life. Whether it is your family or the little things that make your day from time to time.
It’s about having an attitude that is not from a victim’s perspective, it is this kind of awareness that you need to have some more successful and positive version of yourself. So every day make sure that you tell at-least one person that you are grateful for their presence in your life. Make gratitude lists where you thank the universe and acknowledge all the things that you love about your life.
This helps you in keeping your cynicism in check and makes you feel abundant and joyful.
8. Move On
Understand that things or circumstances or even the people who made you feel worse, are not worth and understand that you have all the right to cut them out of your lives. In fact, it is your life, you get to make all the decisions, only keep the people who make you feel like your real self, who keep you grounded but also encourage you to become better.
The past is not what you should be looking at, so resolve any mixed feelings that you have and take your time to heal, but remember to leave it behind. Remember to actively work on your goals and ambitions to change the narrative. Remember that the ones who hurt you do not get to stop you from reclaiming your life.
9. Live the Life you Want to Live
This is the truth, if you lose yourself too much in your sorrows, nobody can help you reclaim your life. Think of the best possible version of yourself, and imagine all the things that best version is doing. Read more books, love more passionately, meditate, practice mindfulness, introspect, work harder for your dreams, just be.
Do all this and understand just how the world works, give yourself credit where its due and pull up your socks wherever necessary, understand the truth and forgive and forget. Learn to accept things and become more compassionate. Learn to look around and appreciate beauty in the universe, understand the price of struggle and never take a moment for granted. Keep that sense of celebration alive.
As you grow older, do not let your soul get worn out with the strife of your life. Keep an element of kindness and innocence intact. Life is not so hard, just learn to discipline your mind and do to take everything so seriously.
Don’t try to be something, just be yourself and laugh more. Our time here is limited, so make a decision about how you want to spend it. The life that is broken is not an anomaly, but learn how to live well, take your time in discovering the same, but just live well.